


I can’t sleep cause my mind keeps racing

by Strength_in_pain



Series: Comforting Peter Parker because he deserves love [8]
Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Back rubs, Coffee, Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Hot Chocolate, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Peter Parker Can’t Sleep, Peter Parker Cold, Peter Parker Gets a Hug, Peter Parker Has Anxiety, Peter Parker Has Nightmares, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker Whump, Tired Peter Parker, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Daddy Issues, Tony Stark is Good With Kids, but not too whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:27:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24165133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Strength_in_pain/pseuds/Strength_in_pain
Summary: Peter explains he hasn’t been sleeping well and this villain has been giving him nightmares and traumatizing thoughts. Tony promises to stay with him.ORA fluffy story where Peter and Tony talk about a bunch of things after a difficult mission. Hot chocolate and comfort will be provided.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Comforting Peter Parker because he deserves love [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1698844
Comments: 22
Kudos: 164





	I can’t sleep cause my mind keeps racing

**Author's Note:**

> Okay! This one is a lot longer and better than my last. It’s got some serious Irondad and Spiderson fluff. I hope you all enjoy :)

Peter could feel himself shivering drastically from the cold. His eyes were struggling to stay open as he listened to the static coming through his suit’s radio transmitter. He tried to turn on his suits heater but it was damaged during battle. 

“Peter! Can you hear me?” A strong male voice echoed through the icy walls which Peter was trapped behind. The cave he was in was about ten feet in diameter and the floor was covered in ice which rose into a small mound at the far edge. It was shallow in depth, but at fifteen, Peter was still too short to punch his way through the top. 

“Mr. Stark? Is that you?”

“Yeah kid, it’s me.” Tony mumbled before shouting back to the others, “I found him!”

Peter listened to the sound of moving footsteps above him, no doubt they were Clint and Natasha’s. 

“Okay, Pete, I need you to back up so I can get you out of here. I’m going to blast open this cave.”

“No!” Peter screamed through chattering teeth. “You can’t use your blast repulsors or you’ll melt Hydro-man.”

“You mean, this stupid plan of yours actually worked?” Clint asked, earning a slap on the head from Nat. 

“Y-yeah, it w-w-worked. But now I’m r-r-really cold.” 

Tony retracted his suit, and stepped out of it. “All right, fine. I’ll do this the old fashioned way.” If a blast of heat would melt the now frozen Hydro-man, then Tony wouldn’t use heat. He would simply use his fists. 

Iron Man pulled on his iron glove and smashed through the ice as hard as he could. Peter noticed a light penetrating through the ice. 

“It’s working, Mr. Stark.” 

Tony repeatedly and frantically punched his way through, ignoring the way his fist throbbed even with the armor. At last, he was able to make a large enough opening that Peter could squeeze his way out. Once he was out of the icy death trap, Peter was clinging to Tony for warmth. 

“Oh God, that was scary,” Peter admitted. The kid felt cold in Tony’s embrace. His numb fingers nestled in Tony’s black hair and his cold nose nuzzled against his neck. Shivers ran down Tony’s spine. 

“Come on, let’s get out of here. Are you hurt?”

“No, just freezing.” 

It felt comforting to hear that Peter wasn’t injured. He so easily could have been. Trying not to think about the million and one ways this evening could have gone terribly wrong, Tony stepped back into his suit, having to pry Peter’s arms away for ten seconds. Peter whimpered at that, feeling miserable with the sudden lack of heat and comfort. 

He went limp when Tony picked him up bridal style, snuggling his head against Iron Man’s chest. 

“I’m going back to the compound with him, are you guys good with finishing up here?”

Clint and Nat nodded, looking below, into the icy cave.

“Looks like Spider-Man took care of everything for us.” Clint said, nodding his head at the frozen Hydro-Man.

“We got this. You just get him under some blankets.” Nat said to which Tony nodded before flying off. 

As Tony was flying to the compound, carrying Peter under his armpit, he was reminded of the night he pulled the boy from the freezing lake. He was so worried and so angry. It was one of the first times Tony realized the kid might try to take on more than he was capable of handling. 

When they finally made it to the compound, Tony was exhausted from the earlier fight. His muscles were aching and his head was spinning but he couldn’t rest yet. Not when Peter was trembling against his shoulder.

He took the kid into his room, handing him a pair of Pepper’s purple sweat-pants (they were the only ones small enough to fit him, and even then Peter had to tie the draw string tightly) and Tony gave him one of his shirts which was way too baggy. 

After changing himself, Tony pushed Peter down on the couch, his stomach doing summersaults when the kid snatched up a blanket like it was a life-saver and throwing it over his shoulders. He huddled underneath, shuddering with an involuntary tremor. 

“Would you like something to drink. You must be cold.” Tony mentally slapped himself for stating to obvious. 

“Uh well... I don’t want to bother you... I mean... you already do so much for me and May...” 

Tony began striding towards the kitchen, disappearing from sight while he listened to Peter ramble. The kid never wanted to accept anything for the fear of being a burden, which was frustrating because Peter was anything but a burden. 

“You pay for too much so I really shouldn’t be taking your food or your drinks. Unless it’s Friday. Because we agreed I can stay here on Friday and sleep over and you can feed me then because that’s fair game. But today isn’t Friday or Saturday.”

“Hot chocolate?” Tony peeked his head through the doorway, “Or hot tea?”

“Oh, uh, I drink coffee now.” 

Tony’s smile visibly faltered at the younger boy’s response. 

“Since when?”

Peter shrugged. “Since things got... intense.”

“Intense? What do you mean? Like intense amounts of stress or -“

“No no, nothing like that. I just... forget it. I like drinking coffee is all.” 

Tony hummed suspiciously, “All right, coffee it is then.”

He went back into the kitchen to brew two steaming mugs and returned with one black and one light brown. 

“How much sugar did you put in this?” Peter asked, peering down into his mug. 

“Sugar? Two scoops. Creamer, pretty much half the bottle.”

“Oh.” Peter smiled. “Is it Starbucks?”

“What?”

“The creamer? Is it Star - okay, okay, sorry. Don’t look at me like that, Mr. Stark.”

“It’s homemade with seven flavor variations.” 

“Of course it is, cause like, you’re Tony Stark. You invent things. It’s what you do.”

Tony grinned, plopping on the couch next to Peter, his hand going for the remote. 

He pressed several buttons in an attempt to select a movie. He settled on a peaceful nature documentary on Netflix that would hopefully soothe Peter to sleep. It was way too late for the kid to be awake if he wanted to go to school tomorrow. 

“Hey Pete, try to get some rest, okay?” 

Peter nodded. There was a tentative pause before the kid snuggled himself further under the blankets, escaping the last bit of chill that still surrounded him. Tony had purposefully turned the heater on, and had it almost as high as it could go. 

“Hey Mr. Stark?” 

“Yeah?”

“Remember when you told me it’s never to early to start thinking of college?”

Tony blinked, his forehead crinkling. “Um, no,” he lied. He only wanted Peter to start thinking about his future because Peter deserved the very best. But he didn’t want to force the thought of college onto the kid. It should be Peter’s choice. 

“You told me to start thinking about college after you pulled me out of the lake, and - and you mentioned something about MIT earlier this week.”

Tony grimaced. This is exactly what he didn’t want to have happen. He wasn’t supposed to project his personal life and his personal wants onto the kid. That was something Howard would do, and Tony was not going to be exactly like Howard. Not when it comes to parenting. Hell, what is he thinking? He wasn’t even Peter’s parent, what was he thinking?

“I wanted to give you options. I know I mentioned MIT because that’s where I went, but you can go wherever. Also, you don’t have to go to college at all. But you’re so smart, it would be a shame if you didn’t go. No wait, that’s not what I wanted to say. Shit. I’m sorry.”

Peter chuckled as Tony struggled to find the right words. “It’s okay, Mr. Stark. I want to go to college anyways.”

Tony let out an auditable sigh of relief. 

“The reason I brought it up was because you never told me what your major was, sir.”

“Oh,” Tony was taken aback, physically tightening his shoulders. It was so out of the blue he almost blanked on what his degree was all those years ago. “I majored in physics and electrical engineering.” He sloppily got the words out. 

Peter smiled, “That’s so cool, and it makes sense too since you like built the arc reactor in a cave which means you had even less resources than normal.” Peter faltered, noticing Tony was smiling sadly at him. But he held his gaze, even though he looked like he would much rather be looking anywhere else. “Oh my God. I’m so sorry, Mr. Stark. I shouldn’t have - I didn’t mean to bring that up.”

“It’s okay,” Tony said, and Peter smiled in relief. “It was a long time ago.”

“I know but it was a horrible time in your life. I shouldn’t have said anything. But if it makes you feel any better, I used to admire you for how you saved yourself.”

Gone was the overwhelmingly painful expression on Tony’s face. In it’s place was nothing more than pure amusement. “Oh yeah?”

“Mhm,” Peter hummed, “I wanted to be smart, just like you. It’s one of the reasons I studied so much.” 

“Well you are smart, kid.” Tony said, leaning his head back against the couch with a yawn. “Now seriously, go to sleep.”

Peter yawned too. “I’m not tired.” 

“It’s probably all this coffee.” 

Peter nodded, “That’s why I drink it.”

Tony snapped his gaze to the small bundle of blankets. Peter scooted his butt towards the edge of the couch, squirming under the stare. 

“W-What?” He stuttered, gripping the blanket tighter. 

“That’s why you drink coffee? To stay awake?”

“Um...” The night was going perfect until Peter just had to opened his mouth. God, sometimes he hated himself.

“Kid, stop overthinking this. Answer my question. Have you been drinking coffee to stay awake?” Tony demanded, because sometimes that’s the only tone Peter will respond to.

“Yes! But only because I haven’t been sleeping very well.” Peter swallowed. 

“You haven’t been sleeping well? What do you mean by that? Have you been having nightmares?”

Peter ducked his head, “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”

“Hey, come on. Talk to me.” 

Silence fell. Every few minutes Peter would shift around, a little closer to the edge of the couch. At one point, Tony was worried he might fall off. 

“Peter,” began Tony, but he stopped, at a loss for how to continue. 

“I’m sorry.” Peter mumbled, running a hand through his defrosted brown hair. “I just - I’m not used to talking about it.”

“Yeah I know. I’m the last person that should even be asking you to open up since I suck at it myself. But maybe if you tell me what’s up, I can help you get some sleep.”

Tony couldn't believe he never noticed the dark circles under Peter’s eyes until now. They were stark against his pale skin. It was as obvious as the weather that Peter wasn’t sleeping well, yet Tony missed all the warning signs. He was starting to think he was worse than Howard at this parenting thing. Even his Dad knew when he wasn’t sleeping well. 

“It’s not a big deal. I’ve just been overthinking some stuff lately.”

“School stuff?”

“No... um... more like Spider-Man stuff.”

Tony dropped his gaze, frowning at his coffee mug, but being quiet enough to let Peter continue processing his thoughts and planning out what he wanted to say. 

“I saw this villain do something... something bad to this woman and I couldn’t sleep at night. I just kept seeing her bloody body, and I felt awful for not being able to save her, but she was dead before I showed up. But still... if I had been there earlier then maybe she would still be alive.”

Tony set down the mug carefully. So that’s what this was about. The kid was having nightmares about some of the things he was forced to see while he was out saving the world. Things can be so unbelievably unfair sometimes. Peter shouldn’t even be witnessing this crap in the first place, but to make matters worse, he’s blaming himself for it. 

“Listen kid. You can’t blame yourself for things like that. Trust me, I know all about guilt. Whether it’s survivors guilt or superhero guilt or just feeling responsible for the people I love dying, I’m an expert in dwelling in it. But that’s not healthy, and it’s that kind of thinking that sent me down many bad paths.”

“I know, Mr. Stark. I know it’s not my fault, but I still _feel_ like it is. I can’t stop feeling things. Sometimes I wish I could. But I can’t no matter how hard I try.”

“No, feeling things is good thing. It keeps you human. It keeps you, you. There are reasons for why we feel things, am I right? 

Peter nodded, “Yeah I guess so. But sometimes I feel like, I feel too much. I mean that literally too Mr. Stark. Sometimes my senses get overwhelmed and I get these awful headaches which May says are totally normal migraines but I’m all like, no May, I’m pretty sure this is not normal because I can literally hear your heartbeat as if I’m wearing a stethoscope and it’s hurting my brain, but whatever May.”

Tony took a sip of his coffee, then removed the cup from Peter’s hand.

“Okay, no more coffee for you.” He said, getting up and going into the kitchen. “I’m making hot chocolate.” 

“Wait, Mr. Stark, there is a bright side to me being traumatized. At least I’ve had plenty of time to catch up on my homework.”

“That is a bright side.” Tony called from the kitchen, moving around some bags of Lays Potato chips and Doritos to find the Swiss hot chocolate packets.

“Yeah. I’ve been staying up all night, and it’s boring with nothing to do. So at least my school work keeps me busy and it gets my mind off of those bad images that keep racing through my mind.”

Tony emerged with two steaming hot cups of cocoa. He sat on the couch, smiling at the fact that Peter had moved more towards the center, and had visibly relaxed against the cushions. At least he didn’t have to worry about him falling off the couch. Score one in the parenting department. Now, onto the second round: getting information out of the kid. 

“How have you been managing to stay awake at school if you have been staying up all night?” Tony asked. 

“Well, funny you should mention that cause yesterday I fell asleep in class and I got yelled at in front of everyone. It was awful.”

“Want me to beat up your teacher?”

“Noooo,” Peter laughed when he noticed the playful glint in Tony’s eyes. They each took a sip of the warm hot chocolate before Peter let out another yawn. 

Tony got off the couch, and grabbed Peter’s legs, moving them to the place where Tony was sitting. 

“All right, now you lay down, and I’ll sit right here on the floor next to you, and if you wake up, I’ll be right here.”

“Okay, Mr. Stark.” Peter hummed in amusement, but he had no intentions of falling asleep. 

Still, he gave it a half-hearted try. He closed his eyes for a little while before focusing them back on the movie. After two hours, the movie had ended and Peter wasn’t any closer to sleeping.

“How long have you gone without sleep like this?” Tony asked quietly, startling Peter from his thoughts while the credits rolled.

“Oh..uh... maybe two or three days... or weeks.”

“Weeks! Peter, what the hell?”

“Mmm,” the kid whined, pulling his blanket snuggly against his shoulder. He turned over, shoving his face against the couch cushions. 

“Don’t turn away from me.” Tony scolded, “You’ve been struggling for a week and you didn’t tell anybody?” 

“Doesn’t matter.” Peter mumbled into the couch.

“It does matter.”

Peter turned over, “No. It doesn’t. What are you going to do to make it better? Sleeping pills won’t work. They go right through me. So what does it matter if I tell you or not?”

Tony raised an eyebrow at the bold tone. He supposed Peter was simply trying to match his own voice. Still, hot-headed behavior an unnatural Peter trait. 

“We could have at least talked about it. I don’t know; maybe if you told your Aunt she could have played therapist.” Tony mused. 

Peter shrugged, thinking it over. “May does do this - thing - sometimes and it helps me sleep. But - well never mind.”

“What?” Tony corked his head. Peter’s back was still turned towards him. 

“I’m not a baby, so she doesn’t do it anymore and it’s stupid.” 

“The baby monitor on your suit says otherwise, Underoos.”

Peter pouted, “Mr. Stark. I’m not a baby.” 

“Of course not. Not when your out saving lives and being a big hero. You can’t be a baby then.”

Peter wasn’t sure where this was going, but for once his mentor actually agreed with him, which was pleasing. But he knew it wasn’t going to last. 

“But when you’re home, and you’re just Peter, then you get to be a kid. Because you still are a kid, Pete, and the things you are witnessing are things no kid should have to witness.”

“‘m okay, Mr. Stark.”

“Yeah I know. You’re like me. Tough all the time even when you don’t have to be.”

Peter furrowed his eyebrows together, thankful that his face was turned into the couch so Tony wouldn’t see his confusion, “I always have to be tough Mr. Stark.”

“Why?” 

“Because... because I’m Spider-Man.”

“No, you’re Peter.”

“I’m both.”

“Yeah you are. But right now, you are just Peter. A kid with a really high IQ and a talent for fumbling words. Spider-Man has to be tough all the time but Peter doesn’t. Do you understand what I’m trying to say?”

“You’re saying that I’m a kid. I get to pretend to be tough when I’m Spider-Man but when I’m Peter, I’m just a lousy kid. But Mr. Stark! I’m not just some kid, I can stop a bus with my bare hands. Come on, doesn’t that count as something to you?”

“So what are you saying?” Tony asked, “That since Spider-Man doesn't need to be babied, Peter doesn’t either?”

“Yes.” 

“I’m gonna let you in on a secret, kid. Even heroes need to be comforted. They really do. Sometimes I do too.”

Peter turned to face him, his pupils huge and a question dangling out of his partially opened mouth. Tony was quick to cut him off.

“So what was it that your Aunt used to do that you’re too “old” and ‘macho’ for now?”

Rolling back over, Peter smushed his face into the couch again, “‘ub m’back.” 

“Speak up, kid.”

“She’d rub my back.” His ears turned pink. “I told you it was stupid!”

Tony shook his head in astonishment. “Kid, that’s the most normal way to comfort anyone.”

“I don’t need it, Mr. Stark. I can fall sleep without being babied.” Peter declared, boldly, looking over his shoulder for conviction. 

“Okay. But if you’re not asleep in ten minutes, I’m doing it.” Tony retorted just as stubbornly. 

A bright smile spread across Peter’s face, but he quickly tried to mask it. “No come on, don’t.” He had to put up a fake argument. After all Spider-Man shouldn’t want back rubs. 

“Ten minutes,” Tony looked at his watch. “Starting now.”

“This is - wow - there aren’t words.” Peter said, throwing out his hands. 

“Nine minutes.” 

“Come on, Mr. Stark. No way a minute flew by that quickly. Are you sure this is minutes and not seconds?”

“Hey Peter. During this time that you’re wasting by complaining about the time, you could be trying to sleep.” 

Peter narrowed his eyes. “Well.” He scoffed, acting deeply offended. “That was unnecessary.”

“Okay, times up.”

“No way, Mr. Stark. You cheated.”

Tony scooted closer to the couch from his position on the floor, and he reached his hand under Peter’s blanket so he could rub at the kid’s back. 

“Hey! No, Mr. Stark, I do not need to be babied like this.” Despite Peter’s complaining, he arched his back closer to Tony’s hand, humming contently at the contact. 

“Yeah, uh-huh, sure.” The corner of Tony’s mouth quirked upright as he felt Peter melt beneath his fingers. 

“Go to sleep, kid. I’ll be right here.”

Peter’s back went ridged, shoulders tensing as he clutched the fabric of the couch tightly between his fists. 

“Relax, kid. I’m here. Nothing’s going to happen.”

“I don’t want another nightmare,” he croaked. 

“I know,” Tony whispered, “I know. But if you do. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Okay.” Peter’s voice sounded defeated, all arguments leaving his system. He fully let his body relax while still relishing in Tony’s touch. 

Tony watched as Peter’s chest started to rise and fall in a rhythmic way, soft and gentle. On a logical level, he knew it was a little creepy to watch someone sleep, but he did promise Peter he would stay next to him. After everything that happened in the ice cave, Peter’s slow inhale-exhale was a constant reminder that he was alive, unhurt, and safe. Tony needed that reminder. 

When Peter had leaped into action hours earlier and volunteered to trick Hydro into freezing himself, Tony hurried to stop him. But Peter was already on the move. Once the kid had his mind made up, there was little to nothing that could stop him. The most concerning part was that he acted in a way that Tony would have. There were so many aspects of Peter’s personality that reminded Tony of himself and it petrified him. Of course, thankfully, there were some aspects where the kid was completely different. But still, thinking about the similarities between them made Tony’s heart ache. 

Eventually his eyes grew heavy, the incredible exhaustion finally catching up to him and he laid down on the floor. Using the pillow from the arm chair, Tony closed his eyes. 

The rhythmic breathing from above hitched, and the older man’s heart began to race. He sat up quickly, about to jostle Peter awake and ask what was wrong but then he groaned. The lamp on the side table had been left on, and in it’s dim glow, Tony glanced over to see Peter’s eyes flutter open. 

The boy locked eyes with Tony, and although he was still groggy, he managed a small smile which Tony instantly returned. 

“Mr. Stark,” he breathed the name like a sigh of relief, “You stayed.”

“Of course I did,” he replied, keeping his voice low. “How are you feeling? Any nightmares?”

“m’tired.” 

“I bet.”

“One nightmare... same one.”

“Do you need anything?”

“Can... can you do that thing again?” 

Tony slid his hand across Peter’s back, rubbing small circles with the heels of his palms. Peter drew in a sharp breath, sighing contently into the pillow. 

“Feel better?” Tony asked.

“Much better. Thanks.”

His heart soaring, Tony found himself playing with the back of Peter’s head, his fingers mindlessly twirling the soft oak tree hair. 

Peter hummed, mumbling incoherent words into the pillow as Tony continued to card his hands through Peter’s thick hair. It was cute, listening to Peter mutter random things. It reminded Tony of how young the boy in front of him really was. Tony gave his back some more attention causing the boy to pipe up with those pleasant mumbles. 

“I love you.” 

Tony froze. Peter’s whispered words echoed around in his head, and he tried not to flinch when Peter rested his head on his shoulder because he felt so raw, so emotionally exposed that it hurt. 

“Back at ya, kid.” He whispered just as softly. 

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, I wanted to say, a lot of this story was inspired by the Frozen Lake incident in homecoming. Even when Tony asks, “Do you feel better” and Peter says, “Much better, thanks.” I wrote that while hearing his voice in my head. So everyone should probably go rewatch that scene again cause it’s cute with the whole heater in the suit moment (◠‿◠) I hope you all have a wonderful week.


End file.
